the hardgrave family

I (David writing) really like to update the blog (even just adding pictures) when I feel that I’ve got something to say that is somehow profound, sublime, challenging, or at least minimally witty. These days, however, moments (and/or thoughts) of any of the above are almost unheard of (yes, I did end the sentence with a preposition, but my 8th grade English teacher assured me that that makes it an adverb). It could be that I’m actually becoming a better judge of what I might say and hence am realizing that I may never have actually had anything to say that truly fell into one of the above categories, or it could be that parenthood is just melting my brain. At this point, I’m really at peace with either option.

At any rate, having no material of late that falls into the afore mentioned categories, today I am motivated by something much more powerful.

Guilt.

So for all of you, our dear friends, who have said so many times, “you’ve got to update your blog,”
I yield.

This one’s for you.

Every year, I try to do some sort of garden with the girls (that is, the little ones who have to do what I tell them). It’s often hard to justify the time, but I have such great memories of the gardens that my mom planted every year and the acres of land that my uncles kept cultivated around my Grandmother’s house, that I just can’t imagine my children growing up not knowing the joy of it all. I know that they’ll never sit with any of their grandmothers shelling bushels of “butter beans” and “shucking” wheel-barrel loads of freshly picked corn as I did, but I’m hoping that, in some way, somehow, our small garden plot will help to yield the kind of virtue that Mr. Jefferson seemed to think was so closely connected to agriculture. No, I’m not trying to raise “tomato-huggers,” but I’ve got to say that there’s just something about the sights, smells, and textures of a garden that seem to refresh the soul and be almost “innately” good. It’s really hard to identify exactly, but well articulated or not, I know that I don’t want my girls to miss it.

So every year we do a garden,

and much to their father’s delight, the girls (the children, not my wife) really do seem to love it.

Sure, a garden is not the gospel, but nonetheless, God has revealed His attributes in creation (Psalm 19, Romans 1) and so just as the earth is “filled with the lovingkindess of the LORD” (psalm 33:5), in someway, I really believe that our little garden helps us each year to taste and perceive the goodness of God and the Glory of His handiwork in a very unique and tangible way.

(and I, for one, know, that they ONLY appropriate response to biting into a good, freshly-picked garden tomato is “Thanks be to God!”)

IN OTHER NEWS . . . .

This is me and my dear, sweet, ever-loving wife in Atlanta for the Georgia Marathon on March 25th. I’ve really got to hand it to her because she was the absolute best cheerleader I could have asked for. Over the 26.2 mile course, She and our friend, Beth Tinkham, managed to negotiate the roads and transit system of an unfamiliar town and to see us off at the start, meet us twice during the race, and again at the end to cheer us on as we crossed the finish line. Thanks so much Angela, you’re the best!

Here is a great shot of our friends, Matt and Beth, before the race that morning. Beth was just one week away from delivering their first baby, David Joshua, and yet was was more supportive and energetic that I could have imagined possible. Amazing.

Matt, you definitely married up (as did your running partner!)

AND FINALLY . . .

Here’s a few pictures from Kathryn’s 4th Birthday Party. Given that Angela couldn’t be at Kathryn’s party last year due to the circumstances surrounding her brother Michael’s funeral, it felt like a big deal for our little family to all be together this year for Kathryn’s birthday party. Thanks so much to all of you who came and/or sent Kathryn cards and presents. She had a great birthday and couldn’t have been any happier.

The girls all playing by the pool on a wonderful 4th of July morning.

The girls all love to swim. Lily is no exception!

After swimming in the morning, David and Sarah went to the local driving range. That’s Sarah above on the way home cooling off with some Gatorade.

Sarah scoping out the lay of the land.

Notice the rusted out truck on the left? For the those of you not from the beloved South, I’ll let you in on a little secret. The way you can tell that this is a driving range and not just a pasture is that the truck is sitting on it’s own tires rather than blocks. (By the way, the truck is affectionately known as “Mater,” as in “Toe-mater,” a red juicy vegetable suitable as a meat subsitute on some sandwiches)

It’s a hit! (Sarah, not me)

This is a great picture for two reasons.

1) Sarah took it. (Not bad for a 5 year old!)

2) It shows just how terrible I am right now at golf. Yes, I have completed the swing and yes, the ball is only about 2 inches off the ground and about to drop right back to were it was before I started my swing. Shameful, I know, but there it is.
An now, on to some Memorial Day Pictures . . .

Many thanks to my Aunt Suise and Uncle Bill who invited us to their condo on Pawley’s Island, South Carolina for the weekend. The whole family had a fabulous time. I think we would live there if we could. The girls are still talking about it. But alas . . .

Sarah as a sand mermaid. Finishing touches complements of my artistically gifted sister, Amanda Smith.

Kathryn and Lily making Sand Castles. Man, did they love the sand.

Remember the end of the “Mary Poppins?” . . . .well, this is me flying a kite with the kids (they are there, just off camera, I promise). If you didn’t learn anything else from that movie, at the very least, you should take away that as a father, you should voluntarily fly kites with your children least some magical nanny have to come to your house, turn your life upside down and make you lose your job so that you’ll have plenty of time to do it then. . . “Let’s go fly a kite!”

Another great shot of Lily. She loves the camera.
And last but not least, below is a picture from Sarah’s dance recital. Way too cute!

There’s a great old Hymn by William Cowper (1731-1800) that containes the following stanza:

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust Him for His grace;
Behind a frowning providence
He hides a smiling face.

The last month has been a pretty tough one in our home. Besides all of the sickness that has been going around the house, We are most saddened to have to report that Angela’s brother, Michael Belcher, passed away on Monday, March 13th, only weeks after haveing been diagnosed with lung cancer. (Michael and his oldest son, Jesse, are pictured above)

There’s so much to say about Michael and how much he will be missed that to adequately begin would require so much more than a webblog could accomadate. Frankly, it just wouldn’t do it justice to attempt to do so here, so please forgive our intentional brievity. Suffice it to say that he is “remembered” by hundreds and maybe thousands of living memorials, those being the family and friends that he loved so much.

These days have indeed been a “Frowning Providence” for us, but we have, in so many ways and by so many people, been warmly reminded that God does indeed “hide a smile” behind all of the things that we strugle to endure and even comprehend.

When placed against the backdrop of death and loss, the blessings of life and family come into sharp relief and focus. You hold your children just a little tighter and longer with each hug, linger longer in that phone conversation you thought you didn’t have time for and perhaps most importantly, you realize that eternity is not nearly as distant a reality as we tend to lull ourselves into thinking that it is.

To all of you who have encouraged us, prayed for Angela and her family, called us, brought us dinner, helped us with the girls and done so many other things, we thank you so much. God’s mercy to us has come through you.

Well, on a lighter, but related note, during all of this, Kathrn turned three years old. Her party was scheduled after to be the Saturday after Michael’s funeral. If not for the fact that we had to cancel Kathryn’s last Birthday party (stomach virus) we would have cancelled this one. However, even though Angela couldn’t make it, we went ahead and held it just as planned (Thanks so much Mom, Emily, Elaine and Nick for helping out!) and Kathryn had a blast. I’ve included some picture’s below. Hope you enjoy . . .